Helpful, Aren't They?

י׳ אדר, תשס״ו

Yesterday I was the recipient of a couple of comments that were bizarre enough on their own, but together had me a bit bewildered.

I was in the supermarket on the way home to pick up a couple of things that I needed. Once inside I realized it was foolish of me to have had the cab drop me by the big store just to get onions and chumus, when the smaller store was still open and closer to my apartment. Especially since it generally takes about 15 minutes to get through checkout at the big stores. Between the absence of baggers in this country and huge amount of food people seem to always be buying (I'm serious -- it's uncanny, and it's not only on Thursday nights!), there is no such thing as a short line, even if there's only two people ahead of you.

Anyway, I looked for an express line, but since there didn't seem to be one, I hedged my bets on one that had more people who each had somewhat fewer items, and settled down to wait. A passing store employee, seeing me standing there with my onions and chumus, said, "This isn't an express line."

Prepared to be pleasantly surprised, I asked, "Is there an express line?"

"No." And she continued on her way.

The guy ahead of me seemed as baffled as I was, looked around, and moved to another line that must have seemed to him likely to move faster. I stayed where I was.

Later on in the evening, I attended a recreational event organized for young-ish (25-42) religious singles and marrieds (but mostly singles), both English- and Hebrew-speakers. The group rented out a bowling alley for a couple of hours for open play on the lanes and on the pool tables at the back, and served some refreshments. Having had an urge to go bowling only a few weeks back, I decided I was going to go this time, even if no one would come with me (which no one did).

I had fun. We were assigned to lanes when we signed in & paid, and I was with three Israeli guys...all of whom I beat in the first game. The second game, I was with the same three plus one woman who joined us...and I beat them all again. I must admit I did play fairly well, according to my own standard, but I had to keep reminding myself that I grew up with the game, taking tips from my parents and from my bowling-league grandfather, whereas these Israelis had played 0-3 times each.

In any case, I also had a nice time chatting with them, even though we were just making small-talk. They were nice enough, it forced me to speak in Hebrew (which I love, but don't do enough), and I supposed there was always the option of one of them deciding I was worth getting to know...

The lanes shut down on our games at exactly 11pm, after which we hung around for a bit watching the end of some pool games. At the point when I decided it would be awkward to stay any longer, I went up to two of the men I had bowled with (who were from the same area and had come together) and said it had been nice to meet them, etc, etc. They responded in kind, and then one said (and I translate/paraphrase here), "I think you should find a chatan and stay here in Israel."

Somewhat taken aback, I hesitated a moment, then put on a quizzical face and replied, "Er...thanks for the the advice." After a pause, I added, "Do you have any suggestions?"

If he was trying to flirt, I figure I gave him the perfect opening to ask me out. But apparently he either wasn't trying to flirt, or he was too shy to follow up on it, because his response was to glance at his buddy and say, "No...all our friends are married."

Now, how exactly is a woman supposed to take that, from a single guy who presumably was attending a social event to meet women??

And furthermore, what is it about these Israelis who seem to want very much to be helpful, but can't quite manage it?!

Shabbat shalom, all...